My phone bill, gas, water, and internet bills are all past due.

My phone has been off for the last few days and I told my sister to call my grandma and tell her that my phone was off, which I’m pretty sure she knows by now, and the bill needs to be paid, and she told my sister she didn’t have any money, which I know is a lie because my grandma ALWAYS has money, whether it’s in the bank or somewhere hidden in her house, she always has money. If she doesn’t want to give em any money to pay the bill, then she doesn’t have to, but she needs to say that and stop telling people she doesn’t have any money.

A couple of weeks ago she told me I needed to go live in Laveen (on 67th Ave & Baseline) in a house with her, my little sister and brother, and my mom, but I told her I wasn’t going to move all the way out there. My mom and sister have have never liked me, so what the hell do I look like living in a house with them ever again in life? I don’t even want them at my house half the time they’re here. My mom has always liked my little sister and brother more, and people think I’m crazy when I say that, but if you weren’t raised by her, or lived with her, then you don’t know what really goes on behind closed doors.

I had to hear constantly, and even to this day, that my sister graduated from high school with her Associate’s degree. I stopped caring about school in the 4th grade when my sister brought home better grades than me and I had tot hear about it, so why would that change just because I got older. I ditched class, drank, smoked, the whole nine yards, just to avoid school, but I stopped my wild ways Junior year, so that I made sure I graduated. Although I didn’t get my Associate’s degree when I graduated, I still graduated nonetheless, and I also went to school over the summer RIGHT after I had graduated.

I already feel like shit. I’m 20 with a kid, I can’t go to school, I haven’t worked in almost two years, I got kicked out of my house last year, and now I’m stuck with a bunch of past due bills that I can’t even pay.

I had to go to court in November for child support and I still haven’t received any payments. I don’t know what to do. I don’t have a way to Gilbert to go to the actual building where they handle all of the child support stuff and it’s not like can ask anyone because they’ll all want gas money that I don’t have.

I can’t ask anyone for anything because I can’t pay them back. I’m stuck between a rock and a hard place at this point.